I Have Nothing to Say

I just have nothing to say lately. It isn't quite writers block. It is more like I just don't have anything on my mind. I am not accustomed to this. I do apologize. My mind is unaccustomed be being blank. I am always thinking about some scenario or something going on in the world. I think my mind is taking a vacation.

I used to wonder what it would like to be normal. On the one hand you are accepted by a broader range of people. On the other hand, you are normal. I am not anti-normal, some people with Aspergers are, they have nasty little names for normal people. That makes them as bad as the people who mistreated them. They do not understand how hard we can be on people.

I used to wonder if being normal would make everything easier, possibly even bearable. In the end I decided I just want to be me and see where that goes. Oh, I had some good news, a wonderful young man who used to be my assistant (read babysitter, confidant, bodyguard and friend) is getting married. I could not be happier. I have watched this young man become a force to be reckoned with.

I have many people who have wanted really bad to be my assistant, to learn from me. I am not bragging, it is just what it is. I don't let people just be my assistant. I pity anyone who is my personal assistant, it is a bad job. I am not mean to anyone who works for me, I am not very demanding per se. But, my personal assistant I expect one thing from, they must be ready, willing and able to do whatever needs to be done. I don't care what it is or how hard it is and they are not allowed to cheat. No skipping a step and attempting to hide it.

When he came to work for me I told him that he could never lie again and that he needed to needed to be as good in bed with his partner as he was at work. ROFL. I really told him that. He assured me that he took care of business. I have spent many wonderful hours with his fiance and him and I believe he has done me proud, he is like a son to me.

I have three daughters and as bad as they can be, I would not trade them for the world. They are mine and I love them. I never felt a need to have a boy, happy with what I got. I trust God on such things; but, it is nice to have young men look up to me. I cannot tell you what a honor it is to have young men ask my advice on personal matters.

As men we are apt to not ask advice, to try and show that we have all the answers. I have young men ask me romance advice. Pretty good for 50. I listen to the stories that young men tell me, stories about seeing their mothers beat, I see their controlled anger and pain. I listen to the stories of young men who just want to get a job and have a wife. This is the hardest time in history for young men. No roll models, no job future and yet they still have all of that young man energy and enthusiasm.

There is a reason young men do stupid things on motorcycles and skate boards and with chili peppers. They have all this strength and energy and it has to be shown. As young men we have a need to show that we are tougher and more fearless than the other guys. We do not do the stupid stuff for girls, we do it for each other. It also reinforces that we can be trusted in a hard situation.

When a man loves a woman, truly loves her, he will do anything to protect her. It is a shame that we have destroyed that type of love. All a man needs is to have a woman look up at him as if he was the answer to fear in her life. There is nothing greater for a man's ego then to have a woman feel safe because he is with her, that trust is the greatest aphrodisiac.

Earlier today, after I found out about my friends wedding, I was sitting with three young men and one young lady in my garage. We were just chit chatting and I mentioned how my friend was getting married. I then told them about what advice I had given my friend for staging their wedding night. Not sexual advice, setting a mood, knowing what she would be thinking. Two of the young men really seemed to be taking notes. How nice that young men want to know how to romance young women.

My ex taught me one thing, women decide what they will wear and what the situation will be when they are going to hurt a man. I thank her for knowing this, the opposite should be true of men. We should think in advance about how we will treat a lady and then we are capable of romance. Romance is making the effort to think of the little things rather than just trying to figure out how to take off a young ladies panties.

Romance is the spice of life. I dated a woman for a year and we never kissed. The first move should always be by the woman. The idea is to let her decide so that she knows she is safe. Women should run relationships because men are stronger. It is just a fact. If you love someone you want to feel safe.

One of the young men I know, and I have mentioned him once before, is a very big and physically intimidating man, he is also very gentle. If I hit him, he would not hit me back. I would never hit him, I like him. If you grew up, as a woman, seeing your mother beat up what would expect from life? My father was a wonderful man, USMC and more. I never saw my father lift his hand to my mother, I never lifted my hand to my ex, my brother never lifted his had to his wife and my brother in law never lifted his hand to my sister. Men never lift their hands to women. If you can prove you are tough by snorting wasubi, you can keep your FXXXing hands off of women.

Again, another rambling post. Sorry. I have no respect for any man who lifts his hands to a woman, use the door and leave. If we are stronger we must earn the right to our strength and that is by love and restraint. Be well.