Thursday, April 26, 2012

A Wedding

My middle child is getting married this weekend. I have many people ask me if I still believe in marriage after my wife's affairs. Yep, I still believe in marriage. Actually, I don't believe in anything short of marriage. I wish all my children to have long and loving marriages, I believe it is still possible.

I remember the day I got married. Most of the elders who attended my wedding are dead. For one it was the last time I saw him, a friend of the family for decades. He played the music at the wedding. I remember standing waiting to say "I do". It was a scary moment, waiting to commit myself to caring for another for life. Marriage is a journey taken with another, sometimes people decide to journey with someone else, it just happens. When you marry, you are supposed to ride out the hard times and we all face them.

I remember the day my middle child was born, her mother almost died in labor. I had to find another doctor to help her and I did. It turned out to be the same doctor who had delivered me and my brother. God works in mysterious ways. I remember the day we bought our first house, that was terrifying. I had to borrow the down payment and lived in fear that I would miss a payment. When I was married I was constantly afraid that I wouldn't be able to take care of my family; but, somehow I always did. Over 20 years of 14 hour days including a 4 hour a day commute and it wore me down. Sometimes I look back on it all and wonder how I ever did it. I remember when my oldest got married, I thought they pulled it off really well. It happened in the middle of the divorce and my ex and I focused on the wedding, we were there for our children, our family. I believe in family, that is why I still believe in marriage.

We don't know what life will bring or how we will handle life's little let downs. All we can do is continue trying. My wish for my child who is getting married is best said in two videos.

YouTube - The Carpenters - We've only just begun.

YouTube - The Carpenters - For all we know.

I pray to God that my children all have long and successful marriages and I congratulate my two eldest for having found people who love them and that they love back.