Something on my mind

Never a good thing, there is something on my mind that I must figure out and I do not know exactly what the question is, something is not quite right in the machine, a pattern that cannot be or better yet a pattern that has hidden part of itself, still it is a patter, it has a logic and must be seen to be real. Once seen, it must see itself or never was real; but, deceived itself. Poetry or prose, let the reader decide.

Joe South - Rest in Peace

A singer songwriter named Joe South died today. He had some amazing songs. I would like to link to one or two of them. Please enjoy.

YouTube - Joe South - Games People Play


YouTube - Elvis Presley - Walk a mile in my shoes


YouTube - Deep Purple - Hush

YouTube - Ray Stevens - Walk a Mile in My Shoes (my favorite version of the song)

YouTube - Lynne Anderson - Rose Garden

He was also a guitarist, he played the electric guitar on this song by Simon and Garfunkel. YouTube - Simon and Garfunkel - The Sound of Silence

My thoughts and prayers go out to his family and friends and I hope my lovely readers enjoyed his music as much as I did. Any of my longtime readers should know that I like to post links to music on occasion. My mother was kind enough to bless me with an appreciation of all types of music. My preferences and a certain type of jazz and classic rock; however, I also listen to country, rap, classical, folk and many other forms. Mr. South wrote, performed and played guitar, he recorded his own hits and was recorded by others and those versions became hits. He was played as Country and as Heavy Rock. The man had talent.

I didn't plan on writing about music or musicians tonight, I actually planned on writing about Honduras and a little experiment they have going on there.

Reward in Pastor Carol Daniels Case

I check my stats for this blog on a fairly regular base. I continue to be fascinated by how many people in Russia read it. When I see a spike in viewership, I try and determine which posts were being searched. Today I saw a spike in readership for the post on Pastor Daniels. I did an internet search and found that the Oklahoma State Bureau of Investigation is offering $10,000 for information leading to the killer's capture. They can be contacted at 1-800-522-8017. Here is a link to the article.

KOCO - OSBI renews reward in pastor homicide case on anniversary


A previous spike in readership had led me to discover an article that claimed that the OSBI had interviewed someone in the Chicago area; but, I chose not to publicize that at the time, I didn't want to get in the way. I don't always publish everything I write or even every comment that I receive for a variety of reasons. While I discuss many different subjects on this blog, it was originally intended to focus on just a few things, it just sort of took a life of it's own and I am okay with that.

In the end, the blog is about you and me, it is about the world around us and what it may mean, it is a free floating, what I read today thing. It is written usually in the time that it takes others to read it, I don't plan out anything more than a day in advance for this blog. This blog is about what matters, us and that is what it says in the title. You matter and Pastor Daniels mattered, we all matter.

Labor Day, Ribs and Nonsense

It is labor day and I am making braised ribs, beef ribs. Yesterday we stripped off the membrane on the ribs and applied the rub. At present the ribs are in the oven on a slow braise utilizing Jack Daniels and Apple Juice. Once finished I will make a reduction and use that as the bbq sauce. I don't know how many of my readers have had my food because I don't know who reads this; but, I know at least one of my readers has had my ribs before and she liked them.

I think Labor Day was supposed to celebrate the workers, the people who build the roads and bridges, the people who build the cars. We used to celebrate having jobs and our accomplishments. During the 60s that all changed, we started seeing work as an offensive type of slavery.

I began working 40 years ago and have worked ever since. I have worked in a factory, as a waiter, as a gas station attendant, as a salesman, in Real Estate and in government. There was a time when I worked putting cardboard boxes together for shipments, that wasn't a good job; but, I did it and it fed my family. I wonder if my ex remembers me gluing my hands shut to stop the bleeding from all the paper cuts, I bet she does.

I couldn't physically do what I did when I was younger anymore and fortunately, I don't have to. I am on my way out and get paid to have answers and I usually have them. The pressure I feel now is over other people and wanting to make the system work for them, so that they can have a career and hopefully make things better. About the only thing I have left is to teach. In a couple of years, Labor Day will no longer be a holiday for me, it will be my life. Everyday will be a day away from work.

As each day passes, I am day closer to passing myself, that is true for all of us. A nice woman came to work with me last week. We were getting to know each other and talking. We had to discuss some problem and she said something like, "Well it could be worse, we could be underground". I don't think of that as worse, just different, a passage that we all make. I have no bucket list, nothing I feel a great urge to attain or experience or see. I am satisfied with the efforts I made even if I would have preferred different outcomes, we don't always get to determine those.

Each day has it's own challenges and rewards, today I am hoping that my ribs come out flavorful and tender, that would be sufficient for an achievement. A friend has often said to me that the person who finishes a journey is not the same as the one who began it. I am not the same as when I began my work life. I kept my integrity and showed what I was capable of and was fairly successful. When I was younger there was no chance you were going to outwork me.

I cannot imagine having grown up without working. My work life contributed to my self definition (though I have never been my job) by challenging me to push myself and achieve and create and oversee. Without work, life would have been very boring. We seem to have forgotten that, it is now just about money and not about effort or strenuous effort, it is about the quick and easy dollar. The dollar loses all meaning when you didn't have to work for it.

Writing is not work, for some it is, for me it is pleasure, it is an expression of self rather than a burden (though I have limits on how much I can write). There are three things for me to decide in the next two years. First, will I remain alone, probably. Second, will I do something after retirement, consult or teach for instance, probably to maybe. Thirdly, what do I want with the rest of my life. I have absolutely no idea; but, I do like the thought of fading away, possibly to slab city. I will link to a video at the end.

People scream USA is number one when we are not. People ask how "we" lost our edge, we didn't, there is no such thing. Effort is an individual and societal thing, you don't get to live off of past generations laurels, you are responsible for what you do with it. China and India have become world powers. We had the advantage, they outworked us, they didn't outwork me. I know I could get a job in China for more than I make here. I just don't care to do it.

I think we all deserve some time to ourselves, time to look back on our lives and ask ourselves what difference we made, the good, the bad and the ugly. Only we can know what our intent was, not the lies we told ourselves, our true intent. I know what mine was and happy with what I attempted and how I did it.

I wonder if younger people think about that, what their efforts will mean to them beyond how much they made? I hope so, it is a good feeling to know you gave your efforts to more than juts making money, that you effected others.

They are all liars and need money to run for office

Well, the Republican National Convention is over, I didn't have to watch it. I read about it, more garbage, I expect nothing different from the Democrats, more garbage and little to no substance. Even the reviews and commentaries are garbage, they discuss look, touch and feel, they don't discuss solutions for they offered none, only hope that they would find solutions. Politics is not about answers, it is about opinions and positions. Cookie chasers and justifications.

I had some respect for Ross Perot, he used to say, he didn't have the answers but he would investigate and make a decision. A good management answer and a poor political answer. We expect perfection from politicians, they must have all answers. I disagree, they must make clear by what criteria they will make their decisions, what they will balance, which choices. That is uncomfortable for them so don't get those answers, we get what nice people they are.

This is theater, it is theater of the absurd, it discusses everything except that which matters. I don't want promises of jobs, I want to hear how it will be achieved. I don't want to hear how your care about people, I want to hear what you will do and how it will effect them.

For the first time in over 50 years a Republican Presidential candidate had failed to discuss war while we actively engaged in at least two. What does he plan on doing about these wars, didn't make the discussion. How many must die, how many must we kill, will he keep us at war or end them. Kind of an important thing, at least I think so. Everyone has an opinion, shouldn't we at least require that our "leaders" have an answer, even if it is imperfect?

Here is the "American Idol" scorecard of the RNC. How is it useful, does it give any answers to the real issues or just discuss how people feel?

Yahoo News - The Atlantic Wire - What They're Saying About Mitt Romney's Big Speech

An Open Statement to Pastor Daniels Killer

To Whom it May Concern,

I never met the fine Pastor, I doubt I have ever met you. There is a chance that you search the internet to find information about what you did. There is a chance that you have read my writings. If you are reading this and it matters then it is not a chance it is God at work. It certainly is not me, I am an illusion or at best some remote person who took an interest in a news article.

I have never been to Anadarko or whatever your city is called. Nobody knows or cares about the town, it is nothing to the rest of us. I bet money you live there. I bet money you will make a mistake, you are an idiot and will talk. Every day you pray that you will not make a mistake, everyone makes mistakes, nobody is perfect. Lets say that you never make a mistake, what will your life be? It can only be a life of separation from others, a life of lies. I have seen that in others, it is not nice, it is solitary confinement by choice. The choice you are making, the only result of failing to admit your choices and choose anew, with a renewed mind, one that learned from it's mistakes.

If you had any sense, you would go back and read as much of this blog as remains. It predates what you did, you made choices and need to take responsibility for your choices or you can never forgive yourself. And here is the most amazing thing in the universe, I truly believe that if you turned your heart to one of forgiveness and love, I believe she would have forgiven you and I believe her whole family would forgive you.

Do you understand that you killed one of the good ones? You actually killed someone who cared more about others than herself. What does that leave you? Is your next step to kill anyone that cares about you, you got one person who cared about you, what is left? I do not believe that Pastor Daniels would hate me for anything I said that was of heart and love and that is the person you killed. I don't hate you and I don't think she would either, she was a woman of love and concern. I believe her family is also, I think she knew how to raise a family better than me. I believe she was better than me or at least stronger

Dear Mr. Killer, you may never read this, in which case nothing I write matters. I can live with that. Now, on the other hand, you might read it once. You will or not read this, what does that cost me in my search. It costs me nothing, no chance of loss. As a consequence, I can address you directly and I do. Pastor Daniels wanted everyone's salvation, she wished none to hell. She and I may have agreed or not agreed on the details of salvation, I am not a member of her church. It really doesn't matter. I believe in my heart that she cares more about your heart than anyone else, I believe that even if you cannot understand that, she cared more about you than herself.

I do not ask you to turn yourself in, I don't really care if you do or don't. I care about your soul and that is what I believe she would have cared about. She forgave you, I believe her family would forgive you and I know I forgave everyone. True forgiveness requires that we accept that others hurt us for the wrong reasons and still love them and then it requires that we accept that we have hurt others with no justification and love them. I have now been contacted by Pastor Daniels family and they can correct me if they think she would feel differently. I personally believe that Pastor Daniels would give her life to save another and that just may be what she did for you. What you do with your life is your choice and God can decide to give you what you asked for, complete selfishness and completely being alone with yourself.

Look, I have plenty of posts for you to review, they are all the same, they are what I think and I believe Pastor Daniels would want you to love others and forgive yourself; but, that requires accepting that you did something wrong and taking responsibility for it. Do it or don't, that is you choosing who you are. Good luck with that if you choose for others not to matter, that is choosing solitary confinement. Have fun.

Funny Money and Other Things

Here is a lovely article from the Huffington Post which explains why you will go all electric in the future. It even discusses how the Federal Reserve wants to get rid of checks. I seem to recall writing recently on how England is getting rid of them next year.

Check Cashiers, Banks Prepare for Paperless Future

You might think it will take a lot of time to eliminate cash, it will not, look how quickly the corner telephone went away.